My husband and daughter and I ventured back to Alberta for Christmas this season, fully aware our three year old would be spoiled by the family she hasn't seen since she was six months old. But we weren't ready for the hoard of presents thrown at her and the temper tantrums that would result after 10 days of getting whatever she wanted from grandparents, aunts and uncles. Why is it OK for grandparents to bend or completely break the rules of parents? Is it payback? They must know what that kind of "get what you want" atmosphere will lead to once the good times end. Perhaps it's an evil tradition passed down from generation to generation meant to make the parents suffer. We left the Sunshine Coast with two carry-on bags and two suitcases to check under the plane. Fast forward 10 days later and we were cramming toys into three borrowed suitcases like Tetris pieces and weighing each bag to make sure it was under the 70-pound Westjet weight limit.
We headed home with five suitcases, one duffel bag and three carry-on bags stuffed to the limit, ready to spring open at the first sign of a weak zipper.
Christmas for us was a whirlwind of visiting family members we haven't seen for years in five different Alberta towns and cities.
We must have put close to the 3,000 km limit on our rental van, but we enjoyed paying the cheap gas rates of about 82 cents a litre, which my mother angrily pointed out had jumped 10 cents the week before. It was a fast and hectic holiday that came with a pile of presents at each stop. I had specifically asked family members to remember we had to take the plane home and to keep the presents small and to a minimum. We had already established the adults would not exchange presents, only the kids, so we thought that would help. We were wrong. Our daughter Kaitlyn got a minimum of 30 presents while on our trip. I say minimum because honestly I haven't finished unpacking them all yet and we even had to leave some behind in a large tote my Mom bought that she'll bring out in May.
As I surveyed the pile of plastic and plush I shook my head in disbelief. Does a three year old really need all that stuff? Kaitlyn will spend more time playing with a stick and a rock outside than with that new plastic pony she got from Santa. And what about all the kids who didn't get toys this Christmas. Surely some of these toys could have been passed on to them.We decided to do a purge of old toys once we got home and we ended up with two huge garbage bags of stuff Kaitlyn hasn't touched for over a year. We're going to donate it this weekend.
Sadly, my daughter is becoming a product of the "I want it" movement that is so much a part of our society. She expected to get more toys everywhere we went and even after dozens of presents she'd cry over not getting the stupid ring out of the gumball machine in the mall. She thinks that she should get everything she wants and everywhere you look in our society she's being beamed that message. My Baba has a saying, "do you want it or do you need it?" It's amazing how little you buy if you actually weigh purchases by that saying. I need to find a way to teach my daughter to be happy with what she has and not to confuse wants with needs. I suppose the best way is to live it myself, which could be difficult while passing a clothing sale rack - but I'll try.
