A few years ago, I suffered a lower back injury that profoundly impacted my life. I had never experienced that level of physical pain before, and when my physiotherapist explained that recovery would take a full year, I was both shocked and overwhelmed. That year was filled with highs and lows but it also deepened my understanding of the powerful connection between physical well-being and mental health.
Now, as I support clients navigating illness, injury and chronic pain, I often reflect on that time. For some, illness or pain has been a lifelong companion; for others, it’s a new and frightening reality.
One thing I recognize — both in myself and in those I work with — is how deeply grief intertwines with illness, injury and chronic pain. It’s not just about the physical limitations that seem to appear at every turn but also the emotional weight of letting go of or putting on hold activities we love, the loneliness of coping with invisible distress and the uncertainty of navigating the healthcare system while trying to meet our body’s unique needs. Here in our small community, we also face limited resources, and that kind of stress can add to what already feels like the burden of recovery.
Pain, injury, and illness change us but by acknowledging their impact, we can also find ways to move forward with greater self-compassion, resilience and hope.
The role of acceptance
Acceptance is a loaded and often misunderstood word. For many, it can feel like being told to be OK with something that, deep down, doesn’t feel okay at all. We might resist the idea, especially when it challenges deeply held values or beliefs.
From a therapeutic perspective, however, acceptance means something quite different. It’s not about resignation — it is about creating space for difficult emotions to rise and fall alongside our experience. When we embrace acceptance — not as giving up, but as acknowledging what is — we allow ourselves to fully experience both the physical and emotional realities of our situation. Rather than avoiding, numbing, or denying our emotions, we make room for healing in a way that honours both our struggles and our resilience.
During my year-long recovery, I had moments of impatience, irritability and sadness. These feelings surfaced when I slept poorly after a painful night or when I had to, time and time again, say no to joining friends for outdoor activities. It truly felt like my life was on hold. In those early days, I was far from accepting my experience.
When we develop what is called psychological flexibility, we cultivate a mindset that acknowledges life’s challenges and recognizes that struggling against our thoughts and feelings can become a barrier to moving through difficult times.
Finding a way forward
One of my core values is prioritizing my well-being, and this became my foundation as I learned to weave acceptance into my physical recovery. From there, I learned several tools to help guide me. I committed to taking things one day at a time, focusing on what I could control at the moment and diligently following the recovery exercises my physiotherapist prescribed. I also made a conscious effort to stay present, stepping away from dwelling on the past — why this injury happened — or projecting into the future, where frustration and fear often lived. Bringing my attention back to the present moment helped me avoid getting stuck in cycles of worry and self-blame.
Another crucial step was allowing space for my emotions rather than suppressing them. I had to acknowledge that feelings of impatience, sadness, and frustration were natural responses to my situation. The more I tried to push them away, the more overwhelming they became. Instead, I practised recognizing that these emotions, like the weather, would change daily. They were part of my experience, but they did not define me. Learning to sit with discomfort, rather than resist it, was a turning point.
Gradually, with time, I did fully recover from my injury. I know that’s not everyone’s experience, but I hope these tools can offer some support to anyone who is struggling with illness, injury, or chronic pain. If you’re facing something difficult right now, consider checking in with yourself about your values — what truly matters to you at this moment — and how that might shape your approach to recovery in whatever form that looks like for you.
For more information on developing psychological flexibility, I encourage you to look into resources for Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). A quick online search will bring up many books, videos, and worksheets to explore.
Sarah Tesla is a counsellor on the Sunshine Coast who supports the diverse needs of clients in rural and remote communities. This column is informational and is not intended to be a substitute for counselling support or services. If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health or substance use, please seek professional support.
